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What I would like to propose is that as an observable social phonemenon politeness is something superficial but to account for what is perceived at the surface we should delve into the depth where different cultural values are rooted. When being complimented, an English-speaking person would readily accept the compliment by saying something like " Thank you" to show his appreciation of the praise, but a Chinese speaker would try to deny the truth of the compliment. They both think they are behaving properly. Yet neither of them would think the other is being polite. The English speaker is being polite to the extent that by accepting and showing appreciation of the compliment, he avoids hurting the positive face of the person who makes it; the Chinese speaker is showing modesty by denigrating himself, ignoring the factuality of the compliment paid to him. As has been mentioned, self-denigration has been at the core of the Chinese noton of politeness for over two thousand years, the Chinese in order to show modesty will go to such lengths as to underrate what he himself has achieved and deny the truth of a complimentary remark. |
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什么是礼貌?
这似乎是一个简单的问题。在日常生活中，我们常常对什么是礼貌的，什么是不礼貌的做出判断。比如，在公共汽车上主动给老年人让座被认为是礼貌的行为而打断别人的谈话被认为是不礼貌的行为；在早晨遇到朋友打招呼被认为是礼貌行为而在餐桌上站起来夹自己想要的菜被认为是不礼貌的行为。因此，礼貌首先应是一种现象，一种可见的社会现象。