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星相奇缘

 
 

What is astrology

How many Aries does it take to change a lightbulb?
Aries changed it already.
白羊座的人已经换过了。

How many Taurians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A Taurus gets bulbs that don't need[1] changing.
金牛座的人买根本不需要换的灯泡。

How many Gemini does it take to change a lightbulb?
At least two to take out the old bulb, two to shop for a new one, two to write a book about it and two more to discuss it on a talk show[2].
至少得有两个人把旧灯泡取下来，两个人去买新的，两个人写一本关于此事的书，还得有两个人在脱口秀节目中讨论这件事。

How many Cancers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Their mom's change it for them. Anyway, they'd light a candle if they have to.
他们的妈妈为他们换过了。不管怎么说，如果他们不得不自己换，那么他们宁愿去点支蜡烛。

    


注释：

[1]need:
后面可以跟现在分词，但表示被动意义，相当于need to be done。所以这里的need changing也就相当于need to be changed。

 

[2]talk show:
港台的一些所谓"脱口秀"的电视或电台的访谈节目就源于英语中的"talk show"。它一改传统的电视节目主持人刻板而程序化的面貌，是一种为大多数人喜闻乐见的节目形式，多由一位反应敏捷、幽默机智的主持人和一些特邀的来宾讨论一些时下热门的话题等等。既然又要talk 又要show，想必主持人也应该是口若悬河、善于表现的吧，那么能言善辩的双子座一定是最佳人选啦。 		 
 
 


How many Leos does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. Their domestic service professionals will change it.
一个都不需要。他们家的专业维修人员会为他们换的。

How many Virgos does it take to change a lightbulb?
Usually just one. However, they will need to clean the sockets[3], read comparative consumer information about light bulbs, check the wiring and read all the guarantees and refund policies.
通常只要一个人。但是他们需要清理插座，阅读关于灯泡的消费信息，检查接线，还要看看各种担保和赔偿保单。

   

[3]sockets:
上网时是不是经常碰到socket error的情况？socket就是指"插座，接口，套接"。

 

 

  
 
 


How many Libras does it take to change a lightbulb?
Well, at least two to shop for the bulb, and a couple more to look for accessories, and maybe a couple more to return the bulb if it didn't work and do lunch.
好吧，至少两个去买灯泡，再有几个去找附件，要是灯泡没法用的话，如果灯泡坏了的话可能还得要几个退灯泡的人，或者几个做午餐的人。

How many Scorpios does it take to change a lightbulb?
A Scorpio's light bulb isn't changed. Why do you ask? Are you a member of a law enforcement agency?
天蝎座的灯泡不用换。你问这个干什么？难道你是执法机构的成员吗？

How many Sagittarians does it take to change a lightbulb?
Sagittarians don't change lightbulbs, but they can teach you how to do it, for a fat[4] fee.
射手座的人不换灯泡，但他们会教你怎么换--如果你会给他们丰厚的酬费的话。

    [4]fat:
fat原指"肥胖的"，经常可以用来比喻酬费优厚a fat fee，大量银行存款a fat bank account。a fat job就是我们常说的"肥差"，fathead脑满肠肥的人，那么当然是指"笨蛋、蠢人"了。

 
 
 


How many Capricorns does it take to change a lightbulb?
Their secretaries will get back to you.
他们的秘书回头会告诉你的。

How many Aquarians does it take to change a lightbulb?
Aquarians don't have to change lightbulbs. They can invent better ones[5].
水瓶座的人无需换灯泡，他们发明出更好的东西来。

How many Pisces does it take to change a lightbulb?
O dear God, I don't know. O that's it, the bulb will change itself, if it is God's will.
噢，亲爱的上帝，我不知道。噢，就是这样，如果这是上帝的意旨，那么灯泡会自动更换的。

 

     [5]They can invent better ones:
因为水瓶座的人富有创造性，出了许多有名的科学家呢。而电灯的发明者--爱迪生就是个水瓶座的天才，这下你该能明白这句话所隐含的意思了吧？