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开心布丁

 


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He Swore to Die

"If you refuse to marry me," he swore, "I shall die." She refused him.
　　He died sixty years later.





他发誓要死

“你如果拒绝和我结婚，” 他发誓说，“我就要死。”她拒绝了他。 六十年以后，他死了。

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Improvement

one student to another: "How are your English lessons coming along?"
　　 "Fine. I used to be the one who couldn't understand Englishmen, and now it's Englishmen who can't understand me."



进步

一位学生对另一位说：“你的英语最近学的怎么样了？”
“很好，我过去不懂英国人说话，可现在是英国人不懂我的话了。”

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Somebody

First man: In my house I'm really somebody.
　　Second man: Is that so?
　　First man: Yes. Every night my wife calls out from the kitchen, "Will somebody take out the garbage?"




人物

第一位男人：我在家里确实是一个人物。
第二位男人：真是这样吗？
第一位男人：是的，每天晚上我妻子都在厨房里喊“来一个人把垃圾拿出去。”
 


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Relative By Marriage

A husband and wife drove for miles in silence after a terrible argument in which neither would budge. The husband pointed to a mule in a pasture. "Relative of yours?" he asked. "Yes," she replied. "By marriage."




婆家的亲戚

一对夫妻开着车出去，走了很长一段时间谁也不吭声。因为在这之前他们曾争吵得很历害，谁也不肯让步。丈夫指着牧场上的一头骡子问道：“是你的亲戚吗？”“是的，”妻子回答，“是婆家的亲戚。”
 


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Ear Short

I thought my wife, Barbara, was losing her hearing, so one day I decided to test it. I quietly walked in the front door and stood 30 feet behind her, "Barbara," I said, "can you hear me?" There was no response, so I moved to 20 feet behind her behind her, "Barbara," I repeated, "can you hear me ?" Still no reply. I advanced to 10 feet and asked, "Now can you hear me?" "Yes, dear," Barbara answered. "For the third time, yes!"




耳聋

我以为我的妻子芭芭拉耳聋了。有一天，我想证明一下，我轻轻走进前门，站在她后面三十英尺的地方，“芭芭拉，”我说，“你听得见我吗？”她没有回答。所以我又走过去一些，站在她后面二十英尺的地方，“芭芭拉，”我重复道，“你听得见我吗？”还是没有回答。我又往前到了只有十英尺的地方，我问：“现在听得见吗？”“是的，亲爱的，”芭芭拉说，“我已经说了第三遍了。”