笑话-开心布丁-休闲区-轻松英语-洪恩在线

　　　　　　　

A Baby Sister

Nurse: Don't you like your new baby sister, Johnny?
　　Johnny: She's all right, but I wish she had been a boy. Willie Smith had got a new sister, and now he'll think I'm trying to copy him.

小妹妹

保姆：约翰尼，你难道不喜欢你新生的小妹妹？
约翰尼：她还可以，但要是个男孩就好了。威利·史密斯先有一个新生的小妹妹。现在他该认为我又在跟他学了。

　　　　　　　

New Testaments

Two sisters were looking at a book of religious pictures and came across a painting of the Virgin and the baby Jesus.
　　"See there," said the older girl, "that's Jesus, and that's his mother."
　　"Where," the younger girl wanted to know, "is his father?"
　　Her sister thought for a moment, then explained, "Oh, he's taking the picture."

圣经书（圣经）新义

姐妹俩在看一本宗教图片集，翻到了一页是圣母马利亚和圣婴耶稣的画片。
“瞧这儿，”姐姐说，“这是耶稣和他的妈妈。”
妹妹问道：“他的爸爸在哪儿？”
姐姐想了一下说：“噢，他在给他们拍照呢。”

They Understood at Last

Two men, who had come to the country for their holidays, were walking in an orchard. They saw that all the trees were bending under a heavy load of apples, except one tree on which there were no apples at all. A small country boy was sitting nearby. They called to him, "Come here, boy. Here's a six pence for you. Do you know why there are no apples on that tree?" "Of course I do, sir. Because it is an oak tree," answered the boy.

他们终于明白了

有两个人来乡村度假。他们走进了一个果园，看到所有的树都被累累的苹果压弯了腰。只有一棵树上一个苹果也没有。一个男孩坐在附近。他们就叫他：“孩子，过来。给你六个便士，你知道为什么这棵树上没有苹果吗？” “先生，我当然知道。因为这是一棵橡树。”男孩回答。

　　　　　　　　　
He's Just Been to the Zoo

When I was waiting in line at the bank, I noticed a woman holding a small child at one of the windows. The boy was eating a roll, which he thrust at the teller. The teller smiled and shook his head. "No, no, dear," said the boy's mother, and then, turning to the teller, "I beg your pardon, young man. Please forgive my son. He's just been to the zoo."

他刚去过动物园

当我在银行里排队时，发现一位妇女抱着一个小孩站在一个窗口。小男孩正在吃一个面包卷，并将面包卷儿戳向出纳员，出纳员笑着摇了摇头。 “别这样，亲爱的，”男孩的妈妈说。然后她转向出纳员说，“对不起，小伙子。请原谅我的儿子，他刚去过动物园。”

　　　　　　　　　
A Silly Rabbit

Little Steve has a pet rabbit, Bunny. He plays with it every day after school. One day his mother sees that her little boy is holding Bunny by the ears. From time to time he gives the poor rabbit an angry shake and says: "How much is two plus two?"
　　"Steve," says his mother, "Why do you treat your poor little Bunny that way?"
　　"Well," explains Steve angrily, "Our teacher says that rabbits multiply very quickly, but this dummy can't even add."

愚蠢的兔子

小史蒂夫有一只心爱的兔子名叫本尼。他每天放学以后都和兔子玩。一天，他妈妈看见他抓着兔子的耳朵，不时地摇着那只可怜的兔子愤怒地说：“二加二等于几？”“史蒂夫，”他妈妈说：“你为什么那样对待可怜的小本尼？” “哼，”史蒂夫气愤地解释道：“我们老师说兔子算乘法算得很快，但这个笨蛋连加法都不会。” 　　　　　[注]multiply可表示“繁殖”，也可表示“乘”。老师的意思是“兔子繁殖很快”，而史蒂夫却理解为后者。